If there’s one thing that we all love to hate about Twitter, it’s the act of live-tweeting. Whether you’re like me and you live-tweet every single political event under the sun, or you’re more interested in posting Beyonce’s every move, there’s something satisfying about adding your voice to the mix. Social media is, after all, truly about inserting yourself into situations that don’t involve you in the slightest, am I right?
But not all live-tweet sessions are created equal. Some timeline spam is a cut above the rest — something of which Twitter user Kelly Keegs is well aware. While sitting on a delayed flight one day, her experience went from “I hate my life. Where’s my wine?” to “Please let this go on forever” in a matter of minutes.
That’s because she got a front-row seat to a painfully dramatic on-board breakup. According to Keegs, Mr. Right saw a window of opportunity to break up with his very own Mrs. Wrong. Here’s how it went down:
Guy: “is this really a surprise? Are you seriously surprised at this information?”
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
Not-so-nice language ahead, folks.
Guy: I don’t care. Girl: IM GLAD YOU DONT CARE
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
JUST LET HER BE GREAT.
“I don’t want to be this girl. I don’t want to be her. I want to be my best for you and YOU WONT LET ME”
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
“Is that what you’re starting to do with me? Just slow fade me OUT? Just like the others?”
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
Ms. Keegs, as all good live-tweeters do, felt some type of way about the ordeal.
This is the greatest plane delay I’ve ever had
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
“I’m just ruining your life in full public view! Calm DOWN.”
Guy: “You need to calm down” Girl: “To me I just really thought, you know, this was going to go somewhere”
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
They did squeeze a moment of zen in there.
Very stoic few minutes pic.twitter.com/eyt4YDlEj3
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
Did he not think of this before he decided to, I don’t know, dump her on a packed flight? Nah.
Girl: “you should probably just stop talking. Just stop TALKING!!”
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
Scandals abound!
Guy: “I can’t discuss this anymore.” Girl: “so I’m not worth your time????”
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
**silent sobs, lots of sniffling**
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
And just when you thought that this could not possibly get any less appropriate…
What the fuck? Now they’re making out. I’m not kidding
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
Drink it down, boo.
We took off, they immediately ordered SIX vodkas and Bloody Mary mix for the 50 minute flight and chugged them in silence between makeouts
— Kelly Keegs (@keegs141) August 24, 2015
(via The New York Post)
Social media is a gift from above and any other opinions are invalid. I mean, if Twitter didn’t happen to be a thing, you wouldn’t have been graced with this made-for-TV moment. I extend my sincerest gratitude to Kelly Keegs for slaying the live-tweet game. We should all feel #blessed for getting a glimpse into this unique brand of madness.